Tweedlecoate Press

Publishing Made Easy

Spotting The Errors – A Group Critique Workshop

A writers’ group which can critique effectively is a valuable resource for all writers. To be able to take your work into a trusted place for honest, unvarnished and constructive suggestions for improvement and well deserved encouragement is something no amount of bought editorial services can match.

Yet many groups feel that all they have to do is murmur ‘very nice’ after each offering and move on to the next one till everyone has read out something.

Picking our flaws and inconsistencies, spotting overuse of individual words, and not being afraid to say if you are confused by the plot, means that when the consensus is that the piece is excellent, the praise is valued because it has been given with integrity. Unfortunately, identifying jarring notes is not something everyone feels comfortable about doing in case they offend the writer.

The following short story plus its covering letter, is designed for a group to spot the flaws. I suggest the group leader distributes the story at the beginning of the session and gives everyone a few minutes to read it and possibly mark it up. Then go round and round the group asking each person to identify one fresh point of criticism each. There are quite a lot, some less obvious than others. When you run out, try another round or two of constructive ideas for improvement.

A good follow up workshop would be for everyone to write a short piece including as many errors as possible for others to spot. Give a small prize for the most mistakes crammed into, say, 100 or 200 words.

For genuine critiquing it is a good idea to follow the ‘kiss, slap, kiss’ mantra. Say something nice and encouraging, then give your criticism or suggestion for improvement, end with something encouraging or praiseworthy. It has to be genuine and it has to be relevant. That is the way to build a trust relationship upon which everyone in the group will come to rely.

And become the most valuable resource you have to produce publication standard writing.

This exercise is designed to work in a group setting but if you've come across it as an individual you're more than welcome to have a go at it yourself. If you want to do that you could send in your answers and we'll let you know how they compare to our master answer sheet.

Dear Editor


I do hope you like this story. It took me a long time to write. Some of the stories you have printed recently have not been very good so I thought this one would help to make your magazine more saleable. Thanks, 

HH. 

Paperclip

By

Hilary Higgins

It was a bright Spring day with a brisk breeze with just a hint of the frost that had marked the previous weeks with the cold, icy frozen finger of a Winter everyone was tired of but too polite to say so. Ted was about to change the tyre on his bike. Normally at this time he would be at football training but the coach had rung and left a message with Mrs Green next door, who usually took their calls during periods when the telephone was cut off, that it was cancelled for this week but would be okay for next. So Ted had decided to use this unexpected free morning to change his tyre.

The man who hung over the garden gate was a complete stranger. Ted returned his greeting truculishly. That open, sunny approach usually hid an official of some sort and Ted’s family had so many fiddles going on at any one time that even the dustman was sometimes treated with suspicion.
“Nice bike,” the stranger said in an open and sunny manner.
“Not mine.” Ted said quickly and automatically. “Doing it for me mate down the road.”
The stranger eyed him speculatively. Ted could feel his neck prickling with tension. The silence seemed to grow until it was on the point of bursting into a cacophony of accusative voices with but one common aim – to wreck his life. If only the stranger would proffer some clue as to what he wanted and where he was from. Ted could then refuse and send him back there.
Or was he looking for Mum? New boyfriend?? There was already one in the house drinking tea though. If he let him past there would be trouble. In fact, this stranger was trouble whichever way you looked at it.
“Push off, buster,” Ted growled aggressively with an unwelcoming look. “You ain’t got nothing we want except the space you’re wasting.”
This was where Ted made his biggest mistake. You see, the stranger was, in fact, a reporter looking for young people to demonstrate bike riding skills for a television documentary and Ted’s unhelpful and aggressive attitude caused him to decide that Ted was not a suitable candidate despite the fact that he was working on the right make and model of bike the programme was centred on. There was going to be generous fees paid to participants as well. 
“Okay, I’m going,” said the stranger with a smile. He smiled again and wandered across the road. Ted saw him pause by Danny Brindle’s house and speak to Danny as the latter came out of the side alley on his, Danny’s, bike.
He carried on changing his tyre.
Later, Danny came to call for him and they went down to the Wild Park where cycling was forbidden but was an excellent place for off roading provided you weren’t caught.
“Guess what?” said Danny.
“What?” said Ted.
“This bloke came round today,” said Danny. “He was looking for bikers for a telly prog. Asked me if I’d do it and I said I would and so I am. Going to get fifty quid for doing it too.”
“Lucky beggar!!!” said Ted jealously. He felt very envious. “Nothing like that ever happens to me.”
They carried on biking through the rougher bits of the Park and splashed through a stream or two but Ted’s heart wasn’t really in it. The breeze had picked up a bit too and there was still a touch of frost in it. But the sun was shining gloriously and everywhere birds were singing and building nests with any old piece of dried grass or cotton thread they could find. A crow flew up to the top of a tree with a crooked stick almost as big as he was and a blackbird tugged a worm out of the ground to chop up with his beak for his brood. A butterfly fluttered past with iridescent wings. All in all, it was a nice Spring day.
When the programme was made Danny was on it and Ted watched it.
 

About 250 words